reflecting voices from marble walls receiving words it’s all just noise inside my head inside my heart this feeling of regret I’m just a child how beautiful you look today a peaceful rest in predecay this wooden box your splintered skin give me some days then let me in your mom is here I heard her cry I believe she meant it and so do I as much as I like to hate them the more I sigh the guilt is mine I wasted time who are these people who seem to care why are they here where were they then you needed trust you started to drift they pushed you even further into the pit my feet are slipping I think I fell can’t feel my body can feel nothing at all I see only flowers like a garden path and my blood is leading way I’m almost there
..a few days later what has passed I don’t remember I’m reading through the scrapbook we wrote together word for word back in December
“Funeral Plans” the chapter read “let’s end this life ..let’s end this shit ..we’re better off, we’re better off ..without those who tell us off ..we are the static in waves of noise we are deceiving but without a voice we are controlled by our own fears we are introverts ..well we are here we are the chosen the ones who cared we are diverse and treated as we are illusions of our own selves..” Hope, I miss you more than my words can express "we are defeated forever broken lived to be open
as life started to close in forever quiet in minds of thoughts and they will choke me till I give up"
and we made funeral plans tried to make sense of the meaning of life
just to lose it again just to lose you again but I will find my way maybe not in life but in death and Hope, this time I will stay
credits
from Love & Anxiety,
released May 21, 2021
Written and performed by DISILLUSIONIST
Produced, mix and mastered by Frederik Brandt Jakobsen
DISILLUSIONIST is Sara Gacic, Jakob Høy and Frederik Brandt Jakobsen
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